寫這封信的目的有兩個，一，是為了感謝能有幸住在關愛之家；二，是想以舍員(曾經)的角度來告訴各位宿舍對我(或其他女孩)來說的意義。 關愛如何和怎樣幫助一些無家可歸的女孩，有什麼服務等...可能你們平常已經從何修女或社工那裡聽了不少遍，所以這次我想以服務使用者的身份來表達一下第一身感受。

在這短短不足兩年的時間裏所經歷的事令我成長了不少。很感謝能有這麼一個安身的地方、感謝這個讓我碰壁的地方。痛了，會有人關心，有人教導。從前，經歷過太多的離合，慢慢的對人對事都不知覺的冷漠了。這個地方令我想起感恩的重要，雖然一次又一次的犯錯，但她們苦口婆心的勸喻、給予機會、「長談」。 這麼多年，居無定所是一件令人痛苦的事。尤其成年以後，提供幫助的機構和資源以僧多粥少來形容就最貼切不過。每天都在擔心明天、一星期、一個月、一年後要「訓街」或是放棄學業，全職工作。我感恩正因為能住在關愛，有些煩惱雖不至於消失，但至少給了人緩口氣的時間。家長社工都會後關心我們之後的去向，有商有量。

這樣有各種各樣的人，家長的性格也不盡相同，在這裡有很多同人相處的機會，讓我學習和更正一些錯誤。

說真的，在這學最多的是如何感恩。以前住的地方都沒有好的結局。都是拍拍屁股就閃人，別說寫什麼感謝的信，大概不罵他們就算不錯了！很過份吧？現在回想也覺得自己太不是東西了，但這裡竟能讓我寫信，是不是很神奇，哈哈哈。不敢說現在人變好、缺點都好了，但至少像一個人了，不再冷冰冰，自私自利的。有收要有給，才能繼續有收嘛。有人說過一句話:「你對十個人好，不一定那十個人會對你好，有兩三個有，就已經很不錯。如果一丁點都不付出，那十個人沒有一個會對你好」道理淺白易懂，只是真的要付出又談何容易，這裡正正教會我，並且正付出了時間去打這感謝信。

很多說話都難以啟齒、難以用文字詳細具體的寫出來。只是我真的很想感謝你們，關愛並不是有社工、家長、有舍員就能運作，雖然真的不太知道董事會是什麼，但知道董事會的支持真的十分最要，繼續堅持為那些無家女孩提供住宿的服務，對我們來說，這不只是一個能容身的地方，更是一個家，有愛的家。

My Childhood

My parents divorced when I was four. My younger sister and I lived with our mother since. My mother was a clueless parent. There was no discipline nor routine to speak of. We led an unruly life.

When I was twelve, mother had a boyfriend who lived with us. The man touched me. I went to my mother but she downplayed the seriousness of the incidents and asked me not to tell anyone. I felt wronged. When night came the man would steal into my bed after I dozed off. Alarmed, I questioned him. “I saw mice on your bed,” was one of his many fabricated excuses.

Desperate, I threatened to kill myself. At her wit’s end, my mother took me to a social worker. She told the social worker that the boyfriend no longer stayed with us, which was a lie. Since then, we did not hear from the social worker.

We were a single-parent household and depended on social welfare. When I was sixteen, I had a huge argument with my mother. She lavished our welfare on her unemployed boyfriend. I felt robbed. I took my sister with me and we left for my aunt.

Life at HCG

Among the relatives, no one believed except my aunt. The rest thought I exaggerated. I insisted on having my mother choose between her boyfriend and I but she gave an ambiguous answer. I gave up. I had been a good daughter to her but she did not deserve it. I did not want to go back to my mother and so I told my aunt about what the man did to me. Aunt took me to a social worker and arrangements were made for my sister and I to live with HCG.

In the past, no one ever cared about my sister and I. Life at HCG came with numerous restrictions concerning every aspect of daily life. Everything was new to me and I found the place constraining. Things took an unexpected turn when my sister did not adjust and moved to a different facility. A reserved person to begin with, slowly I became cold and removed.

Life at HCG wasn’t easy but I found people who cared. Once a week before heading off to work, my aunt made soup and delivered it to me. What’s more, the social workers and house staff were genuinely concerned and they always approached me first. For once I felt understood and accepted.

Turning Over a New Leaf

“Haven’t you always wanted the warmth of a home? Do you want to turn over a new leaf?” Thoughts ran through my head. In many ways HCG was no different than a home. Here I could learn what a home was supposed to be like.

I was a student at Yi Jin and my math grades was poor; F for “Fail” or U for “Unsatisfactory”. Worries that I would not have a career hit me hard. I made a promise to myself that I would accept HCG and lead a disciplined life. Two miraculous things happened. First, I saw great improvement in my focus span and overall health. My grades too, soared from F/U to A. I graduated from Yi Jin and later obtained my higher diploma.

I used to think of myself as the victim. Like many, I felt helpless because life had been unfair. On top of that, because of my family’s disbelief I was ostracized. I could not trust anyone.

At HGC, every girl had a story and there would always be someone willing to listen. Through sharing my story, I learned that I did not need be of ashamed my past for I did nothing wrong. I listened to my mother and kept it a secret because I was young, and my limited understanding told me to obey like a good child would. Furthermore, I wanted to protect my mother from being perceived as a bad parent. I threatened to kill myself only because I knew of no other ways to seek help, and I ran away because home was not a safe place. I did everything I could.

HCG was a place filled with positive energy. Social workers and house staff were caring and attentive. When I preferred to be left alone, they gave me space. They always did little things for me and not once did I feel left out. For the first time, I experienced love.

Transformed by Love

My understanding of love was limited to the sexual exchange between a man and a woman. When I arrived at HCG though, I discovered a love that was unconditional. There were times when I or one of us girls refused help. The social workers and house staff never once gave up on us. I was puzzled. We were not related after all. Who would do that for a stranger?

With the love I was showered in came my transformation. I learned to accept love and reciprocate and most important of all, to love and cherish myself. In order to love others and to become the person she wanted to be, one must first love herself.

Live for Today, Hope for Tomorrow

Looking back, I am grateful toward HCG. Now beside my aunt, the wonderful people of HCG will always be there for me.

I’ve been taught how to protect myself from negativity. Though I still find it difficult to accept my mother, I can be honest with my feelings. My relationship with my sister has not been easy either; sometimes my good intentions are taken the wrong way. HCG taught me patience. I love my sister always and hope she will understand someday.

I have high expectation on myself and often stress over my own mistakes. I noticed though, I am understanding and forgiving toward others but I have not been as kind to myself.

I’ve left school and joined the workforce. I am attending night school to study English. I have a shift job and the hours are long, but I am committed to studying English for 45 minutes a day. I am working toward the career of my dream and I will stay strong no matter what tomorrow brings.

年輕阿伊學中文 

阿怡的母親是越南人。她的父親離開香港到越南經營紡織廠。兩人相識、結婚，生下了阿怡。一家三口在越南生活了十年後，搬回了香港。在香港，一個十歲的孩子通常會上小學四年級，但由於阿怡不會說中文，她被分到了小學二年級。為了趕上進度，阿怡參加了漢語基礎課程。她學習能力很強，在老師和輔導員的幫助下，半年內就掌握了漢語，能夠用流利的粵語與當地學生溝通。許多講普通話的移民與她相比都黯然失色。

出乎意料的是，阿伊覺得學習中文並不難，「我突然開竅了，也不知道是怎麼做到的。」儘管如此，離開越南去一個陌生的地方，對她這個年紀的人來說，意味著要面對一些意想不到的挑戰。

沒有父母的生活
阿伊的父親脾氣暴躁，母親則患有幻覺。他們經常爭吵打架，年幼的阿伊總是被冷落在一旁。阿伊親眼目睹父母爭吵後，淚流滿面的母親用頭撞牆；也目睹母親被打後割腕自殘。這些畫面深深烙印在阿伊的記憶中，揮之不去。

一家三口在香港生活了五年。之後，父親回到越南重操舊業，繼續從事紡織生意。阿伊的母親無法適應香港的生活，便將15歲的阿伊託付給一位她們熟識的老婦人照看。從此，阿伊和老婦人相依為命，互相扶持。

阿伊沒有細說。很難說父母的離開對她來說意味著什麼，因為他們的離開似乎讓她如釋重負。她冷靜而獨立，人們不禁會想，阿伊的冷漠是否源自於日積月累的痛苦和失望。

在HCG的生活 

阿伊在老太太家住了半年。初三時，她被送到旺角的HCG（兒童之家）。和許多其他孩子一樣，阿伊也是透過社工介紹來到HCG的。剛到的時候，阿伊淚流滿面。 HCG的規章制度足足有十頁：「晚上十點關燈」、「限制打電話時間」、「輪流做家事」、「點心時間」等等。阿伊以前的生活無憂無慮，HCG對她來說就像一座監獄。然而，阿伊的適應力很強，很快就適應了這裡的作息。

阿伊在HCG待了半年。這段時間裡，她或許放棄了自己最珍惜的自由，但這段經歷對她來說意義非凡。阿伊很感激HCG提供的專業心理輔導。她學會瞭如何應對痛苦，變得自信起來。她也擅長為朋友們提供心理輔導。 「這叫做傳遞愛心，」她說。阿伊兩年前離開了HCG，但她一直努力保持聯繫；人們常常能在HCG的各種聚會中看到她的身影。與其他政府資助的庇護所相比，HCG在女孩心中佔據著特殊的地位。 “我們不稱HCG為‘庇護所’；HCG就是我們的家，因為它是我們的家。”

“我以後想當一名空服員。” 

阿伊目前正在準備考試，但她心中已定下目標。阿伊承認自己的成績可能不足以上大學，但她相信自己有資格成為空服員。她自信自己流利的越南語會幫助她找到這份工作，「無論如何，我都要成為一名空服員。」阿伊的決心源自於她渴望與家人團聚。 “當我飛回越南時，我就可以去看望我的母親了。

阿伊住在另一家政府資助的收容所。她的父母不久前離婚了，她有兩個妹妹，一個九歲，一個六歲，和一個失業的母親一起生活。兩個女孩沒有機會上學。至於她不負責任的父親，阿伊不抱任何期望。她想盡快開始賺錢，幫忙撫養妹妹們。 二十歲的阿伊決定照顧家人，彌補父母的遺憾。有人可能會反對，這不公平。對有些人來說，選擇寥寥無幾。在離開和擁抱不完美的家庭之間，阿伊選擇了後者。我們衷心祈禱阿伊早日與家人團聚。